the sympathy for moms

I am well into my 29th year, and I am finally starting to feel like life has turned me into a woman.  It took me longer than the average girl, I think.  Don't ask me why, but I subcousciously resisted maturity.  It was my silent rebellion to conformity.  I wear flip flops when I should be wearing boots.  I stay up later than a mom with young kids should.  I don't always cook a vegetable with my meals.  Sometimes I love it when my kid says inappropriate stuff because I want him to be hilarious in this life.

All that to say, I am finally conforming to social norms like green beans, Ugg boots, and the dreaded 10 PM bedtime.  Because it's smart. Because it's good for me.  Because there is a reason the majority of the world does it, and it's not because they are a mindless robot who does what society tells them.
Imagine my surprise, though, when I learned that, with my newfound maturity, comes humility to the life which God has called me. Was that too big a jump? I should apologize for that, but instead I'll just go with it.

You see......I have a problem with the lovey dovey mom articles.  The "I see you, stay at home mom" articles.  "You're not alone in the daily grind" blog posts.  Thanks for those, all of you precious dears. Bless your little hearts.  I actually kind of mean that.....but I think we've seen enough of those for awhile.
Before you think I'm cruel, have no heart or I'm just a giant buzzkill, hear me out.  Stay at home moms do need the occasional encouraging word.  They even need to hear that what they are doing is as important or more so than the CEO who runs a corporation.  But I fear we have gone too far the other direction.  We now feel that people must know how hard it is.  If they don't know, someone should make them know.  Or that our husbands must bow down in awe of how selfless we are.  That working moms just do not get it. Or that all of social media should know how many poopy diapers I've changed today (totally guilty of doing this, by the way).

I am so glad that Jesus is with me throughout my day and really does see what I do and knows my heart.  I'm also glad he does that for my sister who pours into kids all day and comes home to whip up dinner and spend time with her daughter before putting her to bed so she can correct papers.  I'm glad he sees my husband, who wakes up every morning to do his (sometimes monotonous) job and has energy before and after that full-time job to play with kids and even do some contract work after bedtime.  I'm really glad he gives the CEO the discipline to wake up at the crack of dawn and deal with the details of a company I couldn't even begin to understand and handle thousands of employees and even more dollars.  Those other people I mentioned rarely ask for sympathy though, because society doesn't want to feel their pain like the stay at home mom, for some odd reason.  Are we noble? Maybe. But so are others.  No one walks in my shoes, but I don't walk in theirs either.  I'd like to spend more time imagining other's struggles and spend less on my own.  If you've ever spent time in other countries and at first pitied them only to realize they don't need your pity, because they might be better off than you, you know what I mean.  If I imagine others struggles, I don't necessarily pity them, I just learn that mine are not unique.  Not on this side of heaven.  In turn, I am able to have perspective on my situation and move forward instead of marinating on my loneliness or selflessness. No matter the issue, we are best to look past ourselves and look into the lives of others.

As a stay at home mom, please don't give me your pity.  Please don't act like I'm a goddess.  I might receive it and feel pretty good about myself for a minute, but you haven't challenged me at all.